How To Become A Star Style Blogger (spoof from refinery29.com)

 

 image credit to refinery29.com

This is actually true, from my observation of fashion blogs' metamorphoses.

One of the best photo-illustrated spoofs that I have seen in a while. 

Hold an ID, when you go out (at night) in Naija.

not only in Naija actually, anywhere.

So, I was in Abuja for the summer and I went out - clubbing, lounging... often. This is not a feat that I am proud of. Rather, it has been eye-opening and I've learnt a few lessons from these outings, besides knowing who and where to swoon, of course.

One major lesson that I learnt is the importance of having my ID on me, even though it doesn't seem necessary in a country like Nigeria. In Yankee, you def need one cos of age-alcohol concerns.

One time, I got to an accident scene in Central District, Abuja, three minutes after it took place. It was around 3am and it was raining. One of the two cars involved, a Honda Accord(end of discussion) belonged to a friend's friend. To imagine that my three other gfs and I would have been in the car because we were going from one club to the other but there were two other guys in the car already. When we got to the accident scene, I thought to myself, 'what if I had been in that car?'. What if?' Thank God no life was lost and that me and my three other gf s had not sandwiched ourselves in the back seat. Otherwise, someone would have suffered the impact of the crash. How would I have been identified? Long thing because those friends are not known by my folks. o_O

This other time, shortly after prostitutes were banned from the streets of Abuja, I was approached by a Police officer. Note, that this officer didn't have his uniform shirt on, did not introduce himself with his ID or cordially talk to my friend and I. He simply accused us of standing by the roadside, past 12am, in above-the-knee dresses. Sho! we were not even hailing cars because our ride was just around the corner and we were standing infront of our house. That was how we started a long story with the officer oh. He asked for our IDs but we had none on us. The only items in our clutches were cash, money, perfumes.... He refused to allow us go back in and bring out IDS but was ready to detain us till dawn. Imagine, ending up in jail for a night because your standing infront of your house at past 12am. All he kept saying was there is a new law that women should not be standing on the street at that time of the night. oh well. After that incident, we went out with our IDs everytime.

Naija was fun. I can't wait to be back there next year, hopefully.

Thanksgiving

I am thankful for the following:

• I am a college junior ( university 3rd year level) studying Neuroscience (the study of the brain) and I am loving it.
• The chance to study abroad in London, next semester (spring 2010). Holla if you go to Queen Mary, University of London or know someone who goes there.
• The independence that was imposed on me at the age of 10, and it has turned out right so far
• Financial comfortability, meaning that I have all that I NEED, (not want).
• Good health, and hopefully better in the futrue.
• Sanity to not succumb to some worldly desires.
• Good hair, that I neglect sometimes but it still remains fly.
• My myopic sight that has forced me to see the world, patiently
• Technological advances that has made living easier.
• Friends, mostly seasonal but necessary. They all play a role at some point.
• The grace to keep my faith in the existence of God, even when challenged.
• Lastly, for my mum, who has been my mother+father all in one.

Free Twitter Backgrounds

Why are you thankful?

PS:  Holla if you go to Queen Mary, University of London or know someone who goes there.
PPS: ***drumroll*** my birthday is coming closer, DEC 19th. too bad I'll be losing 5 hrs of the day, in air.

Je t'embarasse.

"I am a Nigerian" I was feeling motherland-sick, then I read this. :D

"I am a Nigerian.I am one in 5 Africans.I am one in 8 black people, anywhere in the world.I am a...": "“I am a Nigerian.

I am one in 5 Africans.

I am one in 8 black people, anywhere in the world.

I am a Nobel Prize winner.

An Olympic Gold Medalist.

A Grammy Award Winner.

A Soccer Champion.

A Prince of the Vatican.

An Oscar Nominee.

A Giant of Literature.

A Distinguished Scientist.

A Musical Icon.

My roots lie in the dusty Sahel of the North; in the rich rainforest of the East;

In the Savannah plains of the West; in the oil-filled swamps of the Delta;

In the warmth of our villages and the vibrance of our cities.

My strength flows from the waters of the Niger and the Benue.

My joy springs from the rush of the Gurara Falls and the natural wonders of Yankari.

Nigeria is my rock.

Nigeria is my hope.

Nigeria is my home.

I am the voice of two hundred tribes, speaking three hundred languages.

I am the dance of the circle of life.

I am the laughter of the world’s happiest people.

I am nourished by the crop of the soil, fed by the bounty of the rivers.

I am your neighbor.

I am your friend.

I am a warrior, priest, king

I am a mother, teacher, queen.

I am my brother’s keeper.

I am a sage from an ancient civilization

I am a child in the youngest nation on earth.

I am the beauty,

I am the sound,

I am the vision,

I am the spirit,

I am the passion,

I am the soul of a continent.

I am Nigerian.

I am the HEART OF AFRICA.”

-

Nkiru Asika (via luvvdivine)

Every African is the heart of Africa.

(via fyeahafrica)

"

'For colored girls' an atypical review!

As the house manager of the 'Women of color house' at my university, there was no way that I could turn a blind eye to the movie, 'For colored girls'. So, I organized a program for about 60 students of color to go see it. I saw the movie, by Tyler Perry, last night. It is based on a book, a collection of monologous poems, by Ntozake Shange. Powerful movie I tell ya, it showed issues of abuse, neglect, authority, homosexuality perceptions, results of war, extreme religiousity and it goes on. You know its Tyler Perry, too much will be going on in the movie.
So far, this is my favorite movie of his and the first that was not fully written by him. Also, he did a good job with assembling a cast of very talented actresses and actors to really deliver the message. Like the rape scene was not the typical stuff, the timing of the insensitive act was more emphasized than the rape itself. The opera ensemble was all-black! Like for real tho, I ain't seen that before. Tyler perry didn't use Madea as a comic buffer in this movie either. Comedy was not needed because it is not a movie to be laughed but to resonate about. I mean it was a heavy movie with tragedies. Overall, the theme was 'self-love', it's ok to love someone deeply but you have to keep some for yourself.

I read a review that said the movie was not realistic, are you kidding me? This stuff is real, it happens for real.

The main actresses in the last scene. For colored girls

Some of my favorite quotations from the movie are

'My love is too SANCTIFIED to be thrown at my face'
"Because I had convinced myself that colored girls have no right to sorrow!"
"Being colored is a metaphysical dilemma I have not conquered yet"

Then my favorite monologue is below, it's really about self-love'. It was after the character's partner left her for the umpteenth time for another woman.

somebody almost walked off wid alla my stuff
not my poems or a dance i gave up in the street
but somebody almost walked off wid alla my stuff
like a kleptomaniac workin hard & forgettin while stealin
this is mine/this aint yr stuff/
now why don’t you put me back & let me hang out in my own self
somebody almost walked off wit alla my stuff
& didn’t care enuf to send a note home sayin
i was late for my solo conversation
or two sizes to small for my own tacky skirts
what can anybody do wit somethin of no value on
a open market/ did you getta dime for my things/
hey man/ where are you goin wid alla my stuff/
to ohh & ahh abt/ daddy/ i gotta mainline number
from my own shit/ now wontcha put me back/ & let
me play this duet/ wit silver ring in my nose/
honest to god/ somebody almost run off wit alla my stuff/
& i didnt bring anythin but the kick & sway of it
the perfect ass for my man & none of it is theirs
this is mine/ ntozake ‘her own things’/ that’s my name
now give me my stuff/ i see ya hidin my laugh/ & how i
sit wif my legs open sometimes/ to give my crotch
some sunlight/ & there goes my love my toes my chewed
up finger nails/ niggah/ wif the curls in yr hair/
mr. louisiana hot link/ i want my stuff back/
my rhytums & my voice/ open my mouth/ & let me talk ya
outta/ throwin my shit in the sewar/ this is some delicate
leg & whimsical kiss/ i gotta have to give to my choice/
without you runnin off wit alla my shit/
now you cant have me less i give me away/ & i waz
doin all that/ til ya run off on a good thing/
who is this you left me wit/ some simple bitch
widda bad attitude/ i wants my things/
i want my arm wit the hot iron scar/ & my leg wit the
flea bite/ i want my calloused feet & quik language back
in my mouth/ fried plantains/ pineapple pear juice/
sun-ra & joseph & jules/ i want my own things/ how i lived them/
& give me my memories/ how i waz when i waz there/
you cant have them or do nothin wit them/
stealin my shit from me/ dont make it yrs/ makes it stolen/
somebody almost run off wit alla my stuff/ & i waz standin
there/ lookin at myself/ the whole time
& it waznt a spirit took my stuff/ waz a man whose
ego walked round like Rodan’s shadow/ waz a man faster
n my innocence/ waz a lover/ i made too much
room for/ almost run off wit alla my stuff/
& i didnt know i’d give it up so quik/ & the one runnin wit it/
don’t know he got it/ & i’m shoutin this is mine/ & he dont
know he got it/ my stuff is the anonymous rip[ped off treasure
of the year/ did you know somebody almost got away wit me/
me in a plastic bag under their arm/ me
danglin on a string of personal carelessness/ i’m spattered wit
mud & city rain/ & no i didnt get a chance to take a douche/
hey man/ this is not your perogative/ i gotta have me in my
pocket/ to get round like a good woman shd/ & make the poem
in the pot or the chicken in the dance/ what i got to do/
i gotta get my stuff to do it to/
why dont ya find yr own things/ & leave this package
of me for my destiny/ what ya got to get from me/
i’ll give it to ya/ yeh/ i’ll give it to ya/
round 5:00 in the winter/ when the sky is blue-red/
& Dew City is gettin pressed/ if it’s really my stuff/
ya gotta give it to me/ if ya really want it/ i’m
the only one/ can handle it

This movie is a must-watch.
That is especially if you a woman of color and I know Nigerians in the States(or in any other westernized country) do not really feel the need to relate to the idea of being a 'person of color'. But I tell you that the States is the society that you live in now and every brown skin goes through the same 'sh*t'.


PS: I'm going to see Fela on Broadway. on Saturday! What should I expect??

Update: I never made to seeing Fela. I missed it in London too in Jan, 2011. :(
Je t'embarasse.

Meet the McGhee Sextuplets

Lovely. I wanna have triplets, when I'm ready tho.

PS: if you can, donate. I already gave in my two cents.

Meet the McGhee Sextuplets: "

Mia and Rozonno McGhee and their newborn sextuplets were featured on Good Morning America recently and they need your help. According to reports, the Ohio couple had a hard time conceiving kids so they turned to fertility drugs which resulted in 6 unexpected beautiful babies. However, with one bedroom and a need for six cribs, food, doctors bills, etc the expenses may be too much for the family to handle. Via Their Facebook Page

Mr. and Mrs. McGhee were high-school sweethearts at Linden-McKinley who relied on each other to navigate a difficult adolescence in a tough neighborhood. He was 20 and she was 18 when they married 11 years ago, their only dream to stay together and raise a family.After unsuccessful attempts to have children, the North Side couple turned to fertility drugs. Mrs. McGhee gave birth to twins prematurely last year, and both infants died.When an ultrasound during her next pregnancy revealed multiple heartbeats, she felt devastated again. “They advised us to do the selective reduction,” she said. “We couldn’t.”The McGhees knew they would struggle to afford an instant family of eight. He is a carpet- and upholstery-cleaner; she is leaving her job at JPMorgan Chase to care for the babies.

To donate to a fund for the McGhee sextuplets, visit any Chase Bank location. The account can be found under “The McGhee Trust Fund”” or Rozonno and Mia McGhee. Additional donations in the forms of toys, food, diapers, etc can be sent to IMPACT Attn: Tracy Taylor 700 Bryden Road, Columbus OH 43205.

"

Water awareness project 2010

Hey, I'm really sorry that I have been AWOL for two good months. oh my, summer ended, school started and it's winter already because I don't think the fall season exists anymore.

Below is the shorter version of the report for the project that I ran in Nigeria, this summer.

Much thanks to ~B~ of 1BlackButterfly, who supported me.
__________________

This summer, I started and ran ‘The Water Awareness Project’ in Abuja, Nigeria, with the aid of the Rausch Internship grant from the Environmental Studies Department in my school. There is a growing water crisis in Nigeria with a large proportion of the population having no access to safe drinking water. It is estimated that only half of the 140 million people have access to safe water, and even fewer to basic sanitation facilities.

The goal of Water Awareness Project (WAP) was to create awareness among Nigerian youths on the role of water in practicing good sanitation habits, while emphasizing water conservation practices. In June, I gave 30-minute to 60-minute talks on the role of water in sanitation and water conservation practices in twenty-schools in Central Abuja. In July, I worked with the pupils of an Abro Hallmark International School, located in Mpape, Abuja, a settlement deficient of portable water. With the help of a plumber, the pupils and I installed a water tank that employs a rainwater harvesting system from the rooftop of a school building. This particular activity emphasized the importance of community engagement from one’s younger years and showed a water conservation practice. With the tank installation, It is hoped that the students will spend less time in search of water before classes and medical costs will be reduced as a result of water-related diseases contracted from the use of contaminated water.

At the end of July, I had concluded the water awareness project and conducted mini surveys from the students in participating schools. In the near future, I plan to extend this project to more schools in other parts of Nigeria.

*How to make love!*

Ingredients...

4 laughin eyes,
4 well shaped legs,
4 lovin arms,
2 firm milk containers,
2 nuts,
1 mixin bowl,
1 firm banana...

Method...
1. Look into laughin eyes
2. Spread well shaped legs with lovin arms
3. Squeeze & massage milk containers very gently
4. Gently add firm banana to mixin bowl workin in an out until well creamed
5. As heat rises plunge banana deep into mixin bowl and cover with nuts, leave to soak, preferably not over nite
6. The cake is done when banana is soft, if banana doesn't soften repeat steps 3-5 or change mixin bowls! Note...
If you are in an unfamiliar kitchen..
1. Wash utensils carefully before and after use!
2. Do not lick mixin bowl!
3. If cake rises, leave town...

_________________________________

every line has pun-intentions.

stole it from a friend's fb.

shit is funny as hell. don't ask me if i've followed this recipe lol.

gotta post stuff like this, when you have too much time on your hands in jand.

A letter from London

Dear followers lovers,

Once again, I've tried to satisfy my curious self by travelling to another acclaimed city. This time around, it is London. I have been here for only a few days and one thought that keeps recurring is '1 USD is not = 1 GBP'. By the side of that, every pence counts too and is not as negligible as the cent.

I'm staying with my cousin, an LLM student, and she works the night shift at her workplace. So, she creeps back into the house at the crack of dawn, then sleeps all-day. I kept wondering how many people in London are actually nocturnal workers until I read the free 'London Evening Standard' that stated over 100, 000 workers use the night bus service. Basically, nothing in London is free. I was glancing through a Vibe mag, at a train mini bookstore but the attendant told me to stop unless I was buying it. I thought one could read any unsealed book in a bookstore. Oh well, I just told him that I'm used to American bookstores, where one can camp at Barnes and Noble lol,  and that he should pardon me.

One other thing that my cousin told me to assume is to think every Black person in London is Yoruba, until he/she proves otherwise. Like seriously tho, I have heard more Yoruba spoken than English by black folks around here. Last Sunday, I was in Blackheath and it seemed like the road was invaded by ankara-clad humans. Oh well, Nigerians were coming from the church.

Silly me, I should be a tourist in London but I can't help practicing my number 1 hobby, people watching, full-time. Just in case, you catch a juicey babe, wearing glasses(after 18mths of contacts) and extra-extra-long braids, appreciating the awesomeness of London folks, that's Yinkuslolo!

oh, I have a one-well all-access travel card and I should not be wasting almost 40 pounds. Funny how my Jand friends are vacaying in Naija and I just left them behind there to come to this upgraded Lagos. So, I need places to go but oh well, folks be busy working and crashing all-day lol.

Is this a 'post'?

So many things have happened in the last two months and I have failed to blog about them. Too many things, I swear. My project, details coming later, is almost done.

I leave for London in about a week. Yet, there are still so many things to be done.

I hope all is well with everyone as summer continues.